Jenny Craig

Jenny Craig or JC for short was the balance that I was seeking. It helped give me my glow back, filling me with a new-found freedom.  One the perks of JC was having a council to talk to, it was freeing to be able to talk to someone that wasn't a close friend of mine.  I found that friends will tell you one thing when you really just need someone to support you in a true unattached way.  Don't tell me I`m fine the way I am, when clearly I don't feel that way.  Another obvious great thing about JC was the meals were made for you. You didn't have to think about what you were going to eat or if it was going to make you feel groggy.
 Then late Fall of 2007, I got an 8 to 5 job at a special effects shop called ADI. I was surrounded by squids of the effects world. Everyone had a love for movies and wanted to share this love. The first couple of months I worked there I was educated on some of the basic things I love to this day. We traded movies, music, artists to know, and of course stories.
 These stories then became emotionally confusing, leaving me drained in a different way. The one thing I had to keep me sane was JC. Jenny Craig was always there for me, even if I was unaware of it at the time. It gave me the hope and air that I needed.
 I was growing, becoming more brave and learning to believe in myself. My body was beginning to feel whole--even my thoughts were growing stronger, taking in everything.


Gotta Break It Up

 When I went away to AMDA, I was sure that everything in my life was about to change. It in some ways did. Every morning seemed exciting with different personalities flying everywhere. Some where strong, loud, bold, quiet, a whisper, weak, confused--and all having a desire to perform. 
 My first semester was a daze, with new feelings flying all around me. It started off with grace but slowly turned into a spiral of wide eyes. I had some major personal loss within the span of two weeks in November of 2005. I was far away from my friends and family making it very hard for me to communicate about what happened. The ones in Georgia understood what the loss felt like, some more than others but they were so far away. 
 Slowly my emotions gave way to food and I gained about 20 pounds from my first semester to my last semester of AMDA. Yes, I was a victim of the freshman fifteen plus some. I felt numb and unsure. This wasn't the girl I was supposed to become or even wanted to become. I had a tired anger for myself. AMDA was an emotional roller coaster leaving me feeling empty most of the time. 
 The empty feeling carried over to make-up school. I felt so unhappy because all I wanted to do was change. I NEEDED to change for myself. Once make-up school ended, I went home to visit my family. While there I cut my hair into a short bob and bleached my hair even blonder. It was a start to something new... But my change wasn't completed until I joined Jenny Craig....



It`s been ages but I haven't stopped thinking about you. I PROMISE that. Things have been crazy busy and slow all in the same time. My weeks have been conusmed by school, apartment hunting, 405 traffic ( my beast of burden theses days), and getting scenes together for my reel.  I haven't really had to much time to enjoy the finer things in life. I`m trying though, little by little.

I wanted to show you some lovely beauty photos my good friend Clyde (who is an amazing photographer with a sassy sense of style) took two weeks ago.

Photos/mu by Clyde Blunt

 She`s a dear friend who I`m so glad came into my life. I've learned a lot of from her. If you're interested in seeing more of her work, check out her photo blog